Assumptions!!

Making assumptions are life changers and not life changers for the good. 

I recently read a book and the author was talking about four major "agreements" that people make or do in their life.  They were all thought provoking but the one that played a huge role in my life was the agreement on "Don't Make Assumptions." 

Years ago God taught me a very good lesson in making assumptions. I was making an assumption in a situation and drawing conclusions. It became so real to me that I bellieved it was true not really even knowing if it was true. From my perspective, my assumptions seemed logical...I was evaluating the situation correctly (or so I thought).  Finally, I got the courage to address the situation.  I met with the person involved in my dilemma and I presented my case and asked if I was correct.  To my utter amazement, I was totally wrong and my assumptions couldn't have been further from the truth.

Literally, I was so shocked that I was wrong (because I thought I was so right) that God showed me don't ever make assumptions because you saw how wrong you were in this situation and how it has affected you. In my situation, it was bringing resentment and bitterness and totally affecting my attitude toward this person. When in reality she had done none of the things I thought she had done.
I recently became ensnared again in making assumptions and at times it was consuming my thoughts and robbing my happiness.  I realized I had fallen prey once again to this ghost and I had to find the courage to once again seek the truth to this situation.  I did, and once again what seemed liked actual truth to me turned out to be nothing but fabrications in my own mind. 

We make assumptions all the time.....thinking our partners or our friends know what we think and that we don't have to say what we want. We assume they just know and are going to do what we want.  When they don't we feel hurt. And the drama begins.  I have realized that in life all kinds of assumptions are made because we don't have the courage to ask questions.  It becomes uncomfortable to ask questions.

What is so dangerous about assumptions is that relationships are destroyed over them. For me, I've learned to start asking questions and to make sure communication is clear. And this is another biggy for me, to find my voice and to ask for what I want.  Everyone has the right to tell me yes or no.

Making assumptions is emotional posion.  I have started becoming more aware of this and choosing to not do this and my life is becoming more of what I want it to be. It is one thing to have the knowledge of making assumptions but it's another thing to take the action to not do it.

Thankfully, I have not destroyed any relationships through assumptions.  I eventually got the courage to ask questions but if I hadn't I would not like to think of where I would be now.